Revisiting Being a Stay-at-Home Parent

I am revisiting being a stay-at-home mom since the pandemic and brazenly quitting my job. I haven’t done this since 2007, and I have to say it’s interesting? Well, first off, looking for a job, particularly now, is fairly rotten. I hit up all the job sites, like Indeed and Glassdoor, in addition to going to actual websites of places I might like to work, and I have not had much success. It takes forever, and you have to enter a lot of search filters, leaving you eventually tired, exasperated and cross-eyed. Plus, I don’t even know what I want to do. I clicked on a wide array of positions, including being a Door Dash delivery person, an online social media designer, a development director, and a reporter. I freaked out that I’d get murdered with being a delivery person, so I opted out of that search.

But, then, I stumbled upon what may be my real talent and niche: Camp Counselor Philanthropist! Since school has yet to begin here in our town (first full day is October 13 #brutal), I started Camp Alex: Endless Summer. It’s essentially impossible for working parents now when kids are home all day, so I am helping them out while simultaneously entertaining my own children by having them over for camp. Win-win!

Here’s a look at Camp Alex. First, we have Puppy School, in which the dogs do math and get grades. The kids do “drop-off,” bringing the dogs upstairs with treats, and I do “pick-up.” At this time, I am versed on how well they behaved. For example, today, Poppy got an A+ and Winnie struggled with some addition and got a B+

Didn’t make Honor Roll

Around noon, we have lunchtime, which consists of whatever I can find in my fridge that they might like: edamame, french fries, grilled cheese and gummies.

Healthy!
Questionable

Next, we have play time on the trampoline and on the slide. One of their favorite games, which I created a long time ago as a disciplinary method, is “The Crab.” It’s really quite simple: find some tongs, and chase them around with the tongs biting at their ankles (gently, of course) and their knees. This is the crab! They absolutely love it, and it only costs a pair of tongs! Cheap, officious and fun. Next, we have pool time, in the baby pool, and finally quiet time with puzzles and crafts.

It’s interesting how we fall into things and unknown talents, like me being a camp counselor, during difficult times. I’m making the most of my staying at home during COVID, because I know it could be short lived. I don’t miss being in the office cubicle even one bit. The paycheck? Er, well, that’s another thing. For now, though, these kids laughing is a pretty good payoff.

My kindness rock garden

I Got Into Columbia, But I Can’t Get Into Roblox

I graduated from Columbia, but I can’t get into Roblox, because I’ve failed the verification test too many times. In case you are not sure what that entails, it is simply clicking arrows to put a a goat or a buffalo cartoon image right-side-up. You have to do this eight times, and you have 7 seconds to do so for each image. I failed for the last hour. I can’t set my daughter up with an account. Question: Why is Roblox Fort Knox? Bigger Question: What is wrong with me (don’t answer that) that I can’t determine how to set a goat or buffalo upright? 

IMG_2662
I got this message about 20 times

Perhaps this is because I am not upright.

imgres-5
I may be upside down, but look at my patent leather shoes!

In other words, I’m kinda struggling here– with the pandemic, the decision to send the kids back to school, and looking for a job. The job sitch is almost as grim as the fact that I can’t prove I’m not a robot on Roblox. Yesterday, I applied for three jobs. Two were promising. The other? It was an Amazon remote job, in which I’d be available to talk to people about their FMLA and Disability. I mean, does this really suit me? Probs not! My career pivot looks less like a pivot and more like a circle–or just a cliff dive.

No, honestly, I’m excited about some of the opportunities. But it’s hard to find something remote. And, if I do, when I search on Linked In, it will say there are 122 applicants ahead of me. I mean, I know I’m a solid pick, but 122? That’s kinda rotten chances. I‘d be better off just going to buy a scratch ticket and heading to the beach with an Italian sub.

Speaking of Italian subs, I am not going to eat those anymore, or at least for today, because I decided I’m going to get really skinny. Like, I want to be a coat hanger. I know a lot of people don’t think of that as an attractive image, but I think all clothes look good on hangers, and some of the ones in my closet are really pissed at me that they’ve been benched.

imgres-4
My ideal body #goals

With that, I’m going to go for a long walk, since apparently I won’t be able to play Roblox!